January 2023

      I spent the first few weeks of January getting packed and ready to leave for my renal auto transplant in Madison, Wisconsin. I was nervous for this surgery but knew it was my only chance to live a pain-free life and eat again. On January 21^st, my mom, dad, brother, and I left for Wisconsin. When we arrived, we picked up our rental car and drove to the apartment where we would be staying while we were here. We spent that night unpacking and planning the next day with some fun activities. The next morning we bundled up for the freezing weather and left to walk on the frozen lake. It was so fun to walk out on the ice and snow, something we could never do back home. We saw some people ice fishing and they said the ice was thick enough the drive on too! After lots of walking and throwing snow balls we headed back to the apartment to warm up and watch a movie. Late that afternoon we decided to try some ice skating. It was fun but the wind chill was in the negatives and we were all super cold, so that activity didn’t last long.

      On Monday I had my pre-op blood work and appointment and received my platelet transfusion for surgery. The transplant clinic is brand new and super nice so I was comfortable during my transfusion. William kept me company during this before he left to fly back home. The next day, I packed my hospital bag and rested, in preparation for my big day.

      I woke up early on January 25^th early to finish packing and to get my hair braided. Braids are my lucky hair do for every surgery and procedure. Once we got to the hospital, I got dressed in a gown and socks and answered some pre-op questions. I also got an IV placed which took a while because of my tricky veins. Because of my small and bouncy veins, we decided I would have an IJ, or intra jugular line, placed in my neck during surgery. After talking to the doctors, I was ready for surgery. I said goodbye to my parents and was wheeled back.

      When I began to wake up, I was in the worst pain of my life. The recovery nurses gave me medicine to help me stay comfortable and I drifted back to sleep a few times. Once I was more awake, I began to ask for my parents. I was in so much pain, all I wanted was to see them. But the nurses said they needed to finish setting up all my medicine on the IV pole. After what felt like forever, I was moved to my room on the transplant floor and saw my parents.

     Once I was settled, I asked my mom to help me pull up my gown to look at my belly. Once she did, I was able to see my 9 inch scar, all the way from my sternum, around my belly button, and down to my waist. It was a crazy looking scar, and it was even crazier that a kidney was moved in and out through it. My parents stayed with me until 9 at night when they were required to leave. This was my first time staying in the hospital alone, so I was nervous, but I was able to sleep most of the night.

      The next day, I had to try to stand up for the first time. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. My nurses helped me by holding my arms on either side. After standing for a minute, I was able to take a few steps down the hallway. It was very difficult, but I was proud of myself for pushing through the pain and making it down the hall. The nurses on the transplant floor were absolutely amazing. They helped me stand and walk to the bathroom, brought me my medicine right on time, stayed in my room at night when I was lonely and in pain, and always made me smile. I couldn’t have made it through this first week without them.

      I was on lots of medicine, so I slept for a lot of the first week, but every minute that I was awake, I regretted having the surgery. I was in the worst pain of my life and felt like it would never be worth it. I felt this way until I was able to take a few sips of juice, and that’s when I realized that my left flank and upper epigastric pain that I had before surgery was gone. I could hardly believe it. I could drink without pain. I never thought I would take a sip of water without pain again. But it happened. I didn’t celebrate too much yet because I was worried that the pain would come back, but as I continued to drink, and slowly eat, over the rest of the week, I really began to believe that the surgery worked.

      In between naps, I pushed myself to stand and go on short walks. By the end of the first week, I could walk down the hall with my walker and sit up in a chair for a short amount of time. This might not seem like a big deal, but after a major abdominal surgery, this is a huge accomplishment.

      I also enjoyed opening letters from home and coloring pictures with my mom. But eating small bites of the foods I had missed for so long had to be my favorite part. I had to start slowly, with only a few bites at a time, but the ability to eat and drink even tiny amounts without pain was incredible. I was doing so well that I even thought I might get discharged as soon as I could eat and drink enough to heal from the major surgery.