Lessons I’ve Learned in the Past Year

Two days ago, marked the one year anniversary since I got sick. I woke up on September 16, 2021 with what I thought was a stomach bug, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. One year later, I have four rare and difficult-to-treat conditions and I rely on IV nutrition to survive. I have undergone countless ultrasounds, CT scans, endoscopies, blood tests, nerve blocks, appointments, and attempted treatments, in addition to 2 major surgeries. At this point, I am looking at having many more procedures and tests and at least two more major, open abdominal surgeries to feel better. In the past year, as I have gone through the process of receiving diagnoses and treatments, I have learned a lot. Here are seven important lessons that I want to share.

1. Enjoy the little moments of happiness

The past year has been filled with so many moments of frustration, sadness, and defeat, so I have really learned to truly enjoy little moments of happiness every day. Simple things like Facetiming a friend, going on a short walk with my dog and dad, watching TV with my brother, or helping my mom cook dinner, are now moments that I try really hard to enjoy. If you don’t find a moment of joy each day, making it through each day will be impossible.

2. Learn to be your own advocate

If you have spent as much time as I have fighting for a diagnosis or necessary treatment, you have to learn to be your own advocate. I had to learn not to simply accept what some doctors were telling me, but to think about what I’m being told and if it is the right answer for me. If I had not insisted that something was really wrong with me, I never would have received a single of one my diagnoses. Additionally, I have had to fight for proper medication in the ER when the doctors were not familiar with my conditions. I even had to advocate for sedation for a procedure when I was not comfortable with being awake. Being my own advocate has pushed me out of my comfort zone, but it is so important and is a skill that I will use for the rest of my life.

3. You can do hard things

In the past year, I have had to do a lot of hard things. I have had feeding tubes shoved down my nose, I have had veins blown by failed IV attempts, I have had a seven hour open abdominal surgery that left me with a 5-inch incision, I have had a PICC line placed in my arm, I have had suffered acute kidney injury from dehydration, I have battled severe malnutrition, and much more. A year ago, if you told me that I would have to live through a single one of these things, I would have told you there was no way I could do it. But I did. When hard things come your way, you will find a way through it, and you will come out stronger on the other side.

4. Always try to find the good within the bad

Throughout all of the bad things I have gone through, I have tried to find the good side of it. When I had my first NG tube placed, I was miserable. I was terrified to have a tube pushed down my nose and nervous to live with a tube, but I reminded myself that this experience would make me a better doctor in the future. When I spent what ended up being many weeks in the hospital, I ended up becoming very close with some of my nurses, and now they are some of my favorite people. In order to push through so many scary and awful moments, it has helped me so much to try to find a positive side.

5. Having supportive friends and family can help you through any situation

My friends and family have been the most incredible people in the past year. They are frequently checking in on me and asking what they can do to help. When I was hospitalized, my friends sent gifts to my hospital room, came to visit me, and sent letters for me to read, which always cheered me up. My brother often goes on short walks with me, checks on me to see if I’m doing ok before he goes anywhere, and watches TV with me on the weekends. And my parents have been the most caring, selfless, supportive, and determined people in the world. Without my parents, I would not have any of my diagnoses and would not have access to the treatment that I need. They have dropped everything to get me to appointments and procedures across the country and are continuing to look everywhere to get me the surgery that I need. Without the friends and family that I have, I would never have made it through the past year.

6. Life may not always look like what you imagined, but that’s ok

Today, I should be a freshman in college at UNC, not sitting in my house connected to IV nutrition and in horrible pain. And I should have spent my senior year having fun with my friends at football games and prom, not in the hospital. My life looks nothing like it should, and a year ago I never could have imagined what has happened. But I have learned that it’s ok for things to not go as planned. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and that getting sick has taught me so much that I will use to be a better person and doctor in the future. I may be a year behind my friends, but I am extremely hopeful that in a year I will be able to go to college and resume the life I pictured for myself.

7. Sometimes spending time with a dog is the best kind of medicine

In the past year, I have learned that sometimes the best medicine is lying in bed with my dog. I swear that dogs can tell when you’re sick and are extra sweet. One good thing that has come out of being sick is getting to spend all day at home with my sweet puppy, Rosie. I have also gotten to meet a few service dogs at the hospital. They were such a great distraction from all the stress of a hospital.